My husband is hot... even if he doesn't realize it.

I like to try to get my husband to flex his arm muscles for me. It's not because he is so ripped and muscular (because he's not) and not to get a laugh because he's so scrawny (because he's not). His medium build just does it for me.

I don't even like muscles! But his arms are sexy and I love how you can see the muscles and curves with no veins. It's very appealing (at least to me and let's face it... I'm the only persons who's opinion should matter). But every time I tell him to point the way to the kitchen or the gym he laughs and resists. I practically have to beg to get him to strike a pose.

(This is not James, just a photo I snagged of some site to show you what I'm talking about.)

So today when I asked him to show me how he put some stuff in the attic (thinking he would raise his arms and flex) and where he moved some boxes to (trying to get him to point) in the hopes he would show me those sexy biceps he laughed. I asked him why he always laughs when I make those simple requests and he said it's because he isn't muscular and it makes him think I want a dude with muscles. That is so not the case.

It got me to thinking about how he always says I am sexy and I grab my stomach self consciously and say "It's because you dig fat chicks". I know deep down he likes how I look but because I don't feel as pretty or as sexy as he says I am it's hard for me to just take the compliment and thank him or God forbid... show a little more skin for his sake.

So how after 9 years can neither of us take each others praise about our physical appearance at face value. Why do we and everyone else in the world see ourselves so differently then others see us? I don't have the answer but what I do have to console myself is a hot husband with sexy arms, and butt and various other assets. So with that in mind I am going to stop blogging for now and go cuddle with my sexy man. 

2 Awesome Recipes with BACON!!!

Yes, I love bacon. It's no secret and I don't try to hide it. I am not ashamed of my love affair with bacon. So if you are a bacon lover like me check out these two awesome recipes from my food blog:

BCT Pie (Bacon, Cheese, Tomato)

Spaghetti Carbonara Recipe

Rapunzel, Rapunzel where can you be?!?!

D has fallen in love with Rapunzel. I took her to the Tangled sneak peek and ever since Rapunzel has been in a race neck and neck for favorite character with Dora. If you had any idea how much she loves Dora  you would realize how big that is. She's seen Tangled 3 times!

Well she used her Christmas money to buy a singing Rapunzel doll.

It sings the "When will my life begin" song from the film. It's pretty much the most annoying doll in the world. It's loud and sheds long blond hair everywhere and the hair is always getting matted (causing me to have to braid it's hair). But D  loves her. Since we bought her they have been almost inseparable. In fact D  hasn't been this attached to anything (except her beloved blanket "Manket").

But today when D  went to get Rapunzel she was now where to be found! Come to think of it, I couldn't remember the last time I saw Rapunzel. I believe it was before the last bout of MRSA so that would be last Thursday so where could she be? When D 's having one of her outbreaks we don't leave the house. So I look... and look... and look... and find nothing. I look everywhere, the toy box, the closet, under furniture, even in the refrigerator... but no Rapunzel.

I finally talk D  into leaving the house with her two other Rapunzel's, one is a stuffed doll and the other is a Barbie like doll. She isn't happy but at least she's willing to get in the car. =

When we finally get to the mall and are walking with my friends, we find the Disney store is having a store closing clearance and the singing dolls are on sale!!! But just my luck there are no Rapunzel's. I ask D  if she wants the Aurora (me thinking since she is blond and in a pink skirt she kinda looks like the wayward Rapunzel) but D  wants the Princess and the Frog doll of Tiana. Fine. They are pricey but for 50% off to make her happy I'm buying it. Plus some Rapunzel shoes and a hairbrush that sings.  Not to mention that my friend Lindsay got her daughter Ayla the same doll too so they have matching babies.  That should make her happy right?

You would think so but even though she loved the shoes and brush when I gave her it just didn't make up for the loss of Rapunzel and when I gave her her new Tiana doll she made such a sad and pathetic face:

I ask " Devan, what's wrong? Don't you like your Tiana?"
She cries "I want my Rapunzel!" and begins to sob like someone just ran over her puppy!

Later Lindsay sends me a video of Ayla playing with her doll:

Ayla is singing and dancing with her doll. Now that's what I was hoping for, that's what Devan used to do with Rapunzel but instead I got tears. So the search is on for Rapunzel... I will find her if it's the last thing I do!

Bubble Bubble Boils And Trouble!

I am so glad I didn't do anything to the jerk from Thursday because again while that's just not me I would have thought Fridays problems to be a result of negative karma.

Friday morning as I lay in bed having just glanced at a clock that read 8:15 I thought of how lucky I was to have D sleep in. She is usually up around 7am so I was already envisioning getting her up and taking our time with breakfast and then heading to the mall for our Friday mall playdate and maybe talking Kathryn into strolling around the mall with me to use some of these gift cards I still haven't found time to use.

But then D screamed... but then nothing. "Bad dream," I thought and decided to get up because it was just a matter of time before she was up. But before I made the bed she screamed again. Then a little while later she screamed again and I heard her screaming "MY BACK, MY BACK!"

Dear God she fell out of her bed! She just got moved to a big girl bed (we just converted her crib to a toddler bed days ago). I rushed into her room and she is there... in bed crying. I slowly pull up her shirt and there is nothing on her back. So I pick her up and when I do she shrieks.

This is a shriek that I know too well. This is the shriek she makes when she has a boil. I pull down her diaper and sure enough... a boil. Thankfully this one is towards the top of her butt crack instead of on the cheek where she sits but it doesn't look so good.  It's big and hot and red and hard. The MRSA is back. Well it never really goes away but it's outbreak time again.

I knew then my day would be spent trying to soak her in hot baths and bring this to a head so I can drain it in an attempt to avoid an doctor visit... or worse a doctors draining.  But right now there is a problem with D and the bath.

A few weeks ago she pooped in the tub and since then has been terrified to bathe unless she has just gone poo. Since her last poo was Wednesday she refused to get into the tub and it was a battle that brought me to tears. I got her in but only for a few minutes. She is just petrified of pooping in the tub.

While all this is going on I get a call from B's school that she was tripped and is all cut up on her hands and hip. I am a mess of overwhelming emotions and still trying to soak D and figure out if B was the victim of bullying (which is what I think) or an accident but even she isnt' sure.

So finally James comes home and gets D into the tub. This is what we see:

The picture just can't show the pain and severity of the boil.

But things have turned around a little today. We decided to let B think the fall was an accident because explaining that she may have been bullied could be worse then her thinking it was a mishap and she knows to avoid the other kid now. Plus we wrapped her hands in gauze and babied her extra.

And as for  D's boil... it drained after her morning soak so I am hoping and praying it will be enough to get it to heal without a doctor trip. And of course she was babied too.

Once they are both all healed up the question will be... who is going to baby me?



You've been zapataged!

Neurologist days are always tough and with the help of an ass it was made even worse.

Thursday we had an appointment with the neurologist. These days always tend to be bad because we never actually get anywhere. Add to that the fact that hubby's company changed insurance (not providers mind you... just policies) and you have a giant cluster hump of nurses, copays and us trying to get things figured out when we have still not gotten a current card! I had asked hubs to sort this out prior to Thursday and of course he forgot. But I digress...

We go to the neurologist, tell the doctor that there have been no real changes she just hasn't gotten worse, he then says either "let's change prescriptions or let's keep her on the current meds for another month". We then ask for other programs, doctors or specialists to take her to and we are told that he doesn't really know of "where else for us to go".  I then get upset. Pay my $50 copay and vow to spend hours searching the Internet that day to find something helpful.

I then take B to school and D and I go to Sam's club. Now this is where I really got my panties in a bunch.

I am not one of those to wait for a parking spot but a guy in a front row spot is packing his trunk so I pull down the aisle and turn on my blinker. The guy took forever to load his car and had I not already waited 7 minutes I would have found a new spot but at this point I felt "invested and committed" so I continued to wait.

In the meantime 2 ladies pull up their cart up to the space next to the one I'm waiting on and I see a blue sedan pull up in to turn down the aisle. Because I am an idiot and assume people are good and honest and generally nice I only thought for a moment that this man would steal this spot but then assumed he was waiting for the spot next to it with the ladies loading their car or possibly was waiting to pick up someone from inside and wasn't parking at all.

Well I was wrong. When the guy finally moved his car you could tell he tried to block the sedan from taking the spot but the sedan swerved around him and cut me off and took the spot!!! I was pissed!

I pulled my car to a different aisle and as I walked past the mans car her got out. I was holding D but I decided to say something. He was older so maybe he didn't see me or maybe he did and is having a bad day. I think I really just needed him to apologize even if he meant to do it. so I said nicely and calmly "You know you took the spot I was waiting on." The old man flipped out. "I waited for that spot for 30 minutes!" he screamed. I didn't expect him to be a jerk so I went on attack mode.

"Just because you are old and angry at the world doesn't give you the right to be an ass!" I yelled back.

As I did the ladies loading their car started cheering and clapping "Good for you girl", "I saw what he did and that's not right!", "I'm glad you are saying something!", on and on. Other people stopped walking to the store and to their cars to watch the man yell at me.

"You call yourself a lady? Calling me old?" he yelled. "I never said I was a lady but I did say you were an ASS and you should be happy because a lesser person would do something to your car while you were in the store!" I yelled.

Then as he kept trying to scream I just kept saying "Shut up", "You're full of shit and everyone here is clapping because they know it", "Get in the store and keep walking jerk". I wouldn't let him get a word in at all. Believe me... I may not fight often because I choose not to but if I do even a verbal argument with me can be violent so the fact that I kept walking made me proud of myself and I attribute it to having D in my arms as all this went down. And for anyone shocked that I said all this while holding her call me a bad mom or whatever but she hears worse language while I make dinner so whatever.

In the store I made a point to smile and greet everyone super nicely because I wasn't gonna let this man get to me but I found myself literally plotting revenge. I thought out every detail of just how I was gonna key his car down to positioning my keys in my pocket. Before you get all disgusted know I didn't do it. I'm not like that. But I truly only think it's because I'm a firm believer in karma. I don't generally do anything violent or against the law other then speed and that's almost always on accident. I am a good person and wasn't gonna let this guy make me less of a good person NO MATTER HOW MUCH I WANTED TO GIVE KARMA A HAND WITH HIM!!!

But I did snap a photo of his car:

and I reported him on zapatag.com which is a fun little site where you can tattle on bad drivers. Sure it won't really do anything and neither will posting his car photo here but it made me feel a little better telling others and it's better then becoming a vandal right?

I'm glad I didn't do anything else because even though I really wanted to that's just not me and I know he will get anything he deserves good or bad without my help. And maybe he was having a bad day. Maybe he just found out he has the worlds oldest case of crabs and they are so prehistoric there is no treatment so he will have an itchy crotch for the rest of his life. (I can dream can't I?)

Pretty Pink & Orange Hippo Diaper Cake

Yesterday was my friends baby shower and of course I wanted to make a diaper cake. After all  they are so much fun. And you know me, any excuse to craft something gets me going...

So here is the diaper cake before I actually secured it all together but you can definitely get the idea of what is would look like.

Ingredients for the diaper cake:

50 newborn diapers

50 size 1 diapers

1 white headband 2 with pink button flower

4 handmade hair clips

1 teddy bear pacifier

1 white pacifier

1 handmade loopy hair bow

1 Pink Hippo stuffed toy

1 handmade knitted pink & orange baby blanket

The blanket was made with 2 balls of Bernat Baby Blanket and size 11 circular needles.

Cast on 80 stitches and knit in stockinette stitch (one row knit, next purl) until work is approximately equal lengths on all sides. It's so super soft and big and very easy!

The hair accessories were all made by me as well.

For the headband take a plain headband and layer several silk flowers of different sizes and sew a button through the flowers onto the head band.

For the loopy bow take a french clip and several thin ribbons and make a loop, secure with string wrapped around it, make another loop and continue until no more loops fit. Then fluff and spread to make it look full.

For the hair clips, take a alligator clip and 4 1/2 inches of ribbon the width of the clip and line from the inside bottom of the clip under to the bottom, around the pincher and onto the top using hot glue.

Then make a  3 1/2 inch loop with ribbon. With a 1 inch piece of ribbon wrap the loop and secure it to the clip on the top. Your ribbon sizes and lengths may vary with size of clip and width of ribbon so these are estimates.

I will try to post a tutorial with video and photos for some hair bows in the future but until then if you want to do these or any other crafts I post please feel free to ask any questions you may have. I am always happy to share crafts.

Happy Crafting!

Where'd my weekend go?!?!?

It always seems like, come Monday morning, I am looking back at the last couple of days and it's all a blur. I remember going to dinner and a movie with James on Friday (three cheers for gift cards!), and I recall taking the girls to gymnastics and I know we all went to my The Milk & Honey Tea Room for my moms birthday on Saturday but it seems like just after that I blinked and here it is... MONDAY!

It's not that I don't enjoy my mellow, stay at home and lay low days, but I hate feeling like the weekend flew by and now 5 days lay ahead before the next.

But for being a "chill" weekend it wasn't bad. Like I said we went to tea for my moms birthday.

We had High Tea and both the girls laughed and giggled trying on hats.

B raved about the Raspberry Vanilla Tea and scones.  

Grandma Lori (the birthday girl) helped the girls get all dressed up in the dress up corner of the restaurant.

And here are the "Four Generations" all together. My girls, my mom, my grandmother and I.  

I actually spoke to the owner of the tea room about doing a review since I could easily rave about them already, and possibly do a giveaway for the blog so I'll keep you posted on that.

But now it's Monday and today (like every Monday) I will be cleaning except I have to squeeze in a playdate/baby shower. I knitted the baby a blanket and made a diaper cake. I'll post those photos later. So time to stop blogging and get going on the day and get this week started. 

Not a great start to my morning.

I have only been awake long enough to take a shower and make a cup of coffee and I'm in a bad mood. I actually woke up this way but I think it's a result of last night.

Nothing exceptional happened last night but a friend was upset about something that may or may not happen and then I started to worry and even though I'm saying "whatever happens happens" I'm actually pissed but I don't want to say anything because it's really too soon to get worked up.

So I decided to go to bed and de-stress, after all I didn't spend an hour and a half contorting my body in yoga to be stressed out later in the day for nothing right? So I put on a meditation cd and meditated myself to sleep. Until.... some women with a lisps whispering voice starts telling me "relax your eyes, relax your nose," etc. Not only is this not relaxing but her voice actually woke me up!

So I turned off the cd and tried to get to sleep again the old fashioned way and that took forever but I finally went back to sleep because I started having the most twisted and morbid dreams. In the dream someone was dying while Lindsay Lohan was cheating on a bunch of guys and running through a cornfield. The dream was so whacked out I didn't even bother breaking out the dream dictionary.

By the time I woke up to the sound of James and B clomping around the house, slamming doors, showering and taking out the dogs I was not rested and in a bad mood. I was pissed off before I even sat up. Knowing that when I am pissy before my feet hit the floor I am more volatile then a ticking time bomb I limited my words to anyone and took a shower. Then I made a cup of coffee that really tastes like poo and am sitting trying to blog and get over whatever it is that has my panties in a wad, problem is I just don't know what that is so here I am, paragraphs later and caffeinated and still pissy.

I hope I snap out of it. I have too much to do today and no spare time to let the inner bitch out so hopefully she will go back to sleep or who knows what may happen.

I'm back... 2011 are you ready for me?

Not that I really went anywhere but with the kids out of school for Winter Break I was just too busy to blog or do much of anything really so I just took thing easy.

I'm actually pretty proud of myself. I got all my Christmas gifts completed and everyone seemed to really like their gifts. I also collected over 100 jacket and sweaters for Metropolitan Ministries. My amazing friends donated a toaster oven, food, clothes and gift cards and even Christmas presents to a family in need. I sent a check to The Children's Home and actually rounded it up from the $40.80 that my followers raised to $50.00 and since I budgeted a bit more to be donated then what we actually raised on this blog... I used the difference to purchase toys for Toys for Tots. And as a bonus I can say this was probably the best Christmas I have ever had.

Not just because we were able to give back and do more for those in need but also because everything went great. From getting all the gifts wrapped to cooking the perfect rib roast. We made Christmas cookies and decorated a gingerbread house, and it was all so perfectly "Martha" (as in Martha Stewart). Even the things that didn't go as planned I let roll off my back and nothing really brought me down off the Holiday High.

And now it is a new year. 2011 and I'm not starting it off with tons of resolutions that I probably won't keep (in spite of my best intentions). I made a resolution to be better. Yep, that's it. I want to be a better wife,  mom, person or just a better me. To me that means well... nothing specifically and that's perfect. It's such a broad resolution and there are so many ways to achieve it. The best way I think is to be happy so I will try daily to do something to make me happy. Sure this will probably also benefit James and the kids (I mean who isn't happy when they are eating caramel brownies or going to see a movie or play at the park) but the goal is to make me happy. It's the first selfish resolution I have made in a long time and I think everyone will benefit from it.

So today I'm doing Yoga and I am going to try really hard not to stress about things which is a bad habit I have.  And tonight I will cook one of my favorite meals because being a better me means having a full and satisfied tummy. And then I will read to my kids because that makes me and them happy. And once they are in bed I will curl up on the couch and watch some crappy reality rerun and knit. Because it makes me happy and when I'm happy everything seems better.

So to all of you here is your late Holiday well wishes... I wish you all a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year... and most of all I wish you Happiness.