I don't like Facebook.

I don't like facebook. I don't get Facebook. I mean I get it. It's a social networking site, yadda, yadda, yadda. I just don't get how wrapped up in it people get. And it usually annoys me.

I have an account. I use it daily. I just don't like it. I feel almost peer pressured into using it.

I don't want to be the only one of my friends who doesn't get invited to things because all events are set up on facebook and I can't count on anyone actually sending an invitation or calling me.

I don't want to have even my grandmother ask if I saw the cute photos of my kids and not be able to see what every other member of my family can see and share.

I don't want my business to be left in the dust while every other business has moved onto social media and is thriving there.

So I am on facebook. It's not all bad. Sharing and storing photos is fun. And seeing little statuses and jokes can be ok. But there are a few huge issues that I have with facebook. And here are the top 10.

My Top 10 Issues with Facebook

1. Virtual Friends. People ask to be friends with people they would never approach in any other venue. In fact some of the most shy and antisocial people I know have over 400 friends. But in real life they don't even need 2 hands to count their real friends. You know nothing about some of these people. They could be criminals, freaks or just nasty people who will take what you post and cause problems... and yet we keep adding to our friends list as though having hundreds of anonymous friends you couldn't pick out of a line up is something to strive for. Why not go out and make some real friends or use facebook to plan outings with the friends you have?

2.Virtual Lives. They are not a farmer. They aren't a chef. They don't own a salon or pet store. They aren't even a knight in Camelot. Would they really want to be? They have a life. Is it that bad that they have to spend half of it online creating a new one and asking people to be their neighbor so they can send them stuff?

3. TMI. I'm not just talking about the people who share way too much about their kids latest bowel movement though they are definitely included in this. I'm also talking about the people that check in everywhere from their work, to their home and even in the bathroom. You share all your personal info. You tell people where you are at any given day at any given time. You post everything. FYI... I would never brag about my brand new TV, PC, etc and then post that I am leaving town. Not everyone who sees your posts are  your friends and of those that are, not all can be trusted. (See #1) Somethings shouldn't be publicly shared.

4. Bitchers. They bitch about the people at the grocery store, they bitch about their family, they bitch about people that bitch. Um... hello?!?!? You can also include the "drama haters" in this category too. These people are almost as bad as the

5. Life is Rosiers. Their house is being remodeled. Their husbands a great cook. Their kid has straight As. Their friends are great. Their feet don't stink. Isn't their life so rosy. No ones life's that perfect. Sure these status updates aren't bad in doses mixed with a few "my life sucks today posts" but when all you see is how great everything is... well let's say no one is fooled. Their house is being worked on because it's falling apart. Their husband cooks because he feels guilty he's cheating on them. It's easy to get straight As when their kid is up all night on cocaine studying. Their friends talk about them behind their back and their feet do stink. Are they trying to fool us or just themselves?

6. House Cleaners. Look, they added 354 friends. No one made them do it and there is a good chance that they requested most of them. Are they really so popular that they have to "clean their friends list"? And if they do clean house (which they probably should do see #1) don't make the main qualification for staying a friend be "liking" the house cleaning post.  Seriously... if having them like a post is the determining factor of if they should be on your friends list... they probably shouldn't be on your friends list. They just want feel like people care... admit it.

7. Attention Seekers. Maybe they weren't hugged much as a child. Maybe they are lonely in general. But every post they make is created with the sole purpose of getting people to pay attention to them. These people can be # 3, 4, 5, 6 or any combination. Sure the whole point of social networking is to connect and share but these people are self centered. They actually get upset if they get less then 10 likes and 10 comments on a status. They only really comment on other peoples posts if they can talk about themselves and hijack the post. And they are so self absorbed that they apologize when they don't post for a while... like everyone was waiting with bated breath for their return.

8. Self Portraits. Does anyone honestly think they look sexy with their boobs out, lips puckered facing a mirror with their camera showing?!?!? I guess they do because their albums are filled with shots they have taken of themselves in every outfit they own (and some with lots of skin), or looking tough flexing, in every angle you can manage in a mirror and by the way... can they at least get their dirty clothes off the floor if they are going to publicly post the photo? You should be cleaning your room instead of taking shots or yourself. Or at least have a friend do it so they can tell you how stupid you look.

9. Unfriending someone is the worst thing you can do to a person. Talk about me, my momma, my kids... BUT DON'T UNFRIEND OR BLOCK ME!!!! Long ago before facebook you could dislike someone. Tell them you aren't their friend. Talk bad about them and spread rumors with the final blow being a full confrontation. Now it's all backwards thanks to facebook. Someone makes a post. You take it personal. You make a post.  You virtually confront each other (usually with indirect, vague, passive aggressive statements). You talk trash to people, you spread rumors and then when you are really angry and want to really hurt them... YOU UNFRIENDunfriended because let's be honest...  you probably barely know them outside of the Internet (see #1). It's the lowest of low attacks because it's a first and last strike. It leaves the other person without a course for retaliation. It's not that they unfriended you... it's that they did it first. (Be honest, you know it's true.) Rather then looking at it like a favor you go back to passive aggressive statements but in 3 months to a year when you are unblocked and you get a friend request... you accept. Rinse and Repeat.

10. Tagging. I do not want to be tagged. Hell! I didn't even want photographed! I didn't realize I was standing in the background during a photo at your kids birthday party and the only thing you can see of me was is flat butt or giant belly. Do you really need to tag me? Especially when  you can't even see my face? Seriously. It's just mean.  My new policy is when someone tags me in a crappy photo I post a photo of a Plumbers Crack and tag them. See how they like it.

The absolute worst part of all this... I HAVE DONE EACH ONE AT LEAST ONCE. (And some I have done a lot more!)  And don't even get me started on poking! When did it become ok to poke people?!?!? Keep your virtual hands to yourself!!!